The Authentic Sexual Self

The Authentic Sexual Self is the genuine essence of your sexuality. It lies deep within your being and is a unique expression of your desires, your true innermost fantasies that no one else knows or sees. Some spend a lifetime ignoring it, while others search for it in vain. The Authentic Sexual Self is that powerful place within each of us where the fire is always burning; yet many freeze to death because they cannot access its heat.

As a sex-positive therapist and intimacy advisor I find many clients come to me feeling sexually hollow, suffering from an emptiness of passion. They are either completely detached or unaware of their own desires and fantasies. In fact many of them create a false sexual self in response to what society and others have told them about sexuality: that you must look a certain way, be a certain age, or behave a particular way to be a healthy sexual being. Sadly some individuals simply stay disconnected, or stop themselves from expressing their authentic sexuality, because of a fear of what family members, social and religious authorities, or even their partners may think.

There is nothing sexier than an individual who has connected to their Authentic Sexual Self.

They know what they want, how they like it, and who they are sexually. They radiate an erotic energy and possess a courage and confidence that many only dream of.

How can you experience the liberating heat of the erotic fire that lies within each of us?

First, you must know that what people think of others stems from their own personal stories. Each of us has internalized a belief system and a set of rules, shaped by society and our personal experiences, that shapes and limits how we express ourselves sexually.

But the only thing that matters is your story, what you think of you, and that you are celebrating and expressing your sexuality authentically, exactly the way you want to!

Second, find out who you are sexually. Write your own erotic novel with you as the main character, and give yourself the sexual freedom that you have always longed for.

Be sure to portray the main character as a courageous and strong individual who explores all of their pleasures and passions. And above all, give your story a happy ending!

Third, give yourself permission to be that main character, exactly who you are sexually and to investigate all your fantasies!

Lastly, take the first step, even a tiny one, toward experiencing one or all of your fantasies and giving your story that happy ending!

Be courageous, determined, discreet, and safe in your exploration. Know that you are the sole author of your sexual story and can rewrite it at any time. When you discover your Authentic Sexual Self you will give meaning to your life as never before, and this will allow you to transcend your wildest dreams of who you can be, and who you are sexually!